Are you up to the test!?

I fucking loved Christmas and New Year, got pissed as a fart. If you didn't, sorry to hear that but don't let me catch you moaning on about it like a bloody girl when im trying to tell you how great a time I had, it winds me up and leads to me biting your head off. Not the best way for you to break you recent string of misfortune is it?

Anything been winding me up? Yeah, that James Cunt or whatever his name is, whining on about how good looking his bird is, who give a flying fuck? Sing a song that gets my feet tapping your whiney arsed twat. Honestly, I thought it was bad enough back in the days of David Gray but there seem to be legions of these moany arsed singers nowadays all moaning about how their girlfriends have left them or have snuffed it. Either way these ladies are better off in my opinion.

Oh! One annoying thing pre-Christmas was the queues in the Post Office, now im not the sort of spoilt twat that moans about queues but the queues here weren't moving because old ladies were pissing gossiping to the staff. 'How's your Alice?', 'How's your Tonys leg been since the operation?', 'I saw Gladis the other day wearing a brand new skirt the cheeky bitch, she fools no-one, I saw her buy it in Scope'...... Shite like that. It's bad enough having to send packages to my native China, on top of that having to actually write the contents on the box, I mean fair enough my nan most likely is going to guess that im sending her some bamboo as that's the only thing she likes but let there be at least a chance she's in for a change eh?

I recommend setting up a new queue in the post office for old women to chat about their feeble lives, letting regular people and Pandas go about their business.

Panda out.