The craziest thing I've seen on TV in a while
*Warning this post is pretty sick*
Okay I only just remembered this about an hour ago and it made me actually laugh out loud, it was this crazy thing that was on TV last night, you'll probably think I made it up but I've got to share this with someone.
So im flipping through the channels and there's this guy in his living room, he's oldish and I figure it must be about the rise in taxes, he can't afford heating or something like that but then he starts going about his sex drive and im just bemused, then the guy says he has a sex doll.
Okay, the guys like nearly seventy, you know when you hear something unexpected and for a minute your frozen to the spot, well that was me. So the guys going on about fucking this doll and he's using those words that perverts use to try and not sound like perverts, such as 'excited', 'insert', 'facilitate' etc... You get the idea so then he blows my mind once more by asking the camera crew if they want to see it, Christ, they follow him up these stairs to this bed room and there's this doll which is spookily life like, kind looked like a dead body and he's got this immense system of ropes and pulleys THAT DIDN'T COME WITH THE DOLL, he just figured if he's going to be fucking a doll he's going to do it in style.
This isn't even the craziest part, next he's giving us a dry run of what he does with the doll, like he's altering all these ropes and shit and explaining how certain positions are more life like, he actually lifts one of the dolls legs and he's like imitating the position of fucking this doll, all the time he's got a total straight face, I was in tears at this point. The camera crew are starting to back of into the hallway, you know, they're making a vain effort to distance themselves from this shit but in a way I could relate to where they were coming from, they want to get away but they couldn't take their eyes off this spectacle.
So at this point I can hardly breath with laughter, he's still fully clothed but he's got this dolls legs open and he's giving us a running commentary of what he usually get up to, all the way through this he's kept using all these polite words never once saying anything actually graphic. But this is where it got golden for me, to quote the guy;
'... so at this point before finishing, I would usually extract myself and come round to the side, now this is a feature most people don't usually take advantage off, the doll has excellent hands which I put to good use, I think its amazing for err..... stroking my bollocks.'
Now that's comic gold, this dude should have his own show or something, just that minute slip where he reveals the dirty bastard he is.
The rest that I watched was a bit dull in comparison, he was going on about how he took pictures of himself fucking the doll and then put someone's head on the doll via photoshop. I mean, I kinda feel sorry for the guy because he's incredibly horny and no women wants to sleep with him but can you honestly picture what his grandchildren must be like.
Anyways, I've shared my bizarre experience, now to find his blog.....
Okay I only just remembered this about an hour ago and it made me actually laugh out loud, it was this crazy thing that was on TV last night, you'll probably think I made it up but I've got to share this with someone.
So im flipping through the channels and there's this guy in his living room, he's oldish and I figure it must be about the rise in taxes, he can't afford heating or something like that but then he starts going about his sex drive and im just bemused, then the guy says he has a sex doll.
Okay, the guys like nearly seventy, you know when you hear something unexpected and for a minute your frozen to the spot, well that was me. So the guys going on about fucking this doll and he's using those words that perverts use to try and not sound like perverts, such as 'excited', 'insert', 'facilitate' etc... You get the idea so then he blows my mind once more by asking the camera crew if they want to see it, Christ, they follow him up these stairs to this bed room and there's this doll which is spookily life like, kind looked like a dead body and he's got this immense system of ropes and pulleys THAT DIDN'T COME WITH THE DOLL, he just figured if he's going to be fucking a doll he's going to do it in style.
This isn't even the craziest part, next he's giving us a dry run of what he does with the doll, like he's altering all these ropes and shit and explaining how certain positions are more life like, he actually lifts one of the dolls legs and he's like imitating the position of fucking this doll, all the time he's got a total straight face, I was in tears at this point. The camera crew are starting to back of into the hallway, you know, they're making a vain effort to distance themselves from this shit but in a way I could relate to where they were coming from, they want to get away but they couldn't take their eyes off this spectacle.
So at this point I can hardly breath with laughter, he's still fully clothed but he's got this dolls legs open and he's giving us a running commentary of what he usually get up to, all the way through this he's kept using all these polite words never once saying anything actually graphic. But this is where it got golden for me, to quote the guy;
'... so at this point before finishing, I would usually extract myself and come round to the side, now this is a feature most people don't usually take advantage off, the doll has excellent hands which I put to good use, I think its amazing for err..... stroking my bollocks.'
Now that's comic gold, this dude should have his own show or something, just that minute slip where he reveals the dirty bastard he is.
The rest that I watched was a bit dull in comparison, he was going on about how he took pictures of himself fucking the doll and then put someone's head on the doll via photoshop. I mean, I kinda feel sorry for the guy because he's incredibly horny and no women wants to sleep with him but can you honestly picture what his grandchildren must be like.
Anyways, I've shared my bizarre experience, now to find his blog.....
