I Found This Quite Touching
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Sunday, March 11, 2007
Monday, March 05, 2007
Hairy
You know whats been worrying me lately?
It might be quicker if you just tell me.
Nose hair.
Nose hair?
Yeah, I have way too much of the stuff.
* Has a quick look * You don't have that much.
But for my age....?
Do you pluck?
Oh aye, I pluck like a demon but it hurts like fuck!
Have you considered getting a strimmer?
Is that what they call them?
Think so.
Well of course I've considered getting one from... where would you get a nose strimmer from?
Dunno, Argos I'd imagine.
With my luck when ordering aforementioned strimmer I'd be served by the most beutiful woman to have ever worked in Argos.
Yup, sods law.
More like always-looking-like-a-twat-at-the-worst-possible-moment law.
I think sods law is a bit punchier.
And then of course there's always the worry that Im plucking/strimming too much thereby dammaging my nose.
How often do you service your hooter?
Every other day.
Christ on a bike.
Too much?
I'd say.
How often do you prune your schnozz?
I'd don't know, maybe once a month?
Fuck.
Fuck indeed. By the time you're forty you'll have ropes coming down.
Shitting hell, do you think I could get electrolysis for my conk on the NHS?
I doubt it.
Hmmmm, maybe I could just do it myself with a tazer?
Are you suggesting tasering yourself in the neb?
What's the alternative?
Growing a mustache.
... Fuck it, im buying a tazer.
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- Im like Superman without the super. With a head cold. Confused? Me too.
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