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Tuesday, August 15, 2006 

Great Potatoes Of Fire

Jesus Christ! Gave myself a right scare the other day. Banged some potatoes in the old microwave, now I might have left them a big longer than what can be called 'a reasonable amount of time', when I returned the kitchen was full of smoke and the 'wave was a box of flames! I near about shat myself. After a cup of water, some wafting and the opening of doors all was sorted but christ, at the time I was a nervous wreck.

Watching Apocalypse Now today, with the potatoe incident in the front of my mind, I can quite confidently say I wouldn't have lasted long in the Vietnam war.

All through the potatoe fire incident of 2006 the smoke alarms didn't once go off, today while shaving the bastards went off. Obviously fearing the worst I zoomed round the house twice before coming to the conclusion that the bastards were having a laugh at my expense.

Man cooking.

You really are a Ray Mears type aren't you?

Spud-U-Don't-Like, then?

1. Prick the potato
2.place in wave box
3.set timer for 10.00 mins
4.ping! get off arse and turn over spuds.(spuds are part nuked potatoes)
5.repeat step 2
6.Ping! time to get off your arse again.
7.Remove spuds from wave box and eat.
8.Alternatively lob waved spuds in to hot oven to get that crispy skin. or get your self a girl friend or boyfriend as the case maybe, who can cook.
Please note: timings are based on a 20 year old 650watt wave box.

By bastards, do you mean the potatoes were laughing at you?

RD - Is he like that bloke who assualts crocodiles? If so, then yes.

A - U-Got-That-Right

J - The next time I tackle a potato I shall do so with confidence thanks to these handy instructions. Im being totally sincere here, I'll probably print them out.

S - Im not sure. I'll be melodramatic and say that I was refering to the fates.

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