Are you up to the test!?

* Panda was a guest writer here at AYUTTT many moons ago, he contacted me yesterday asking if he could have another rant, I was more than happy to oblige (less work for me).*

Alright.

Im fucking seething. People keep giving me shit about getting married. 'Oh, when are you going to get married?', 'When are you going to make an honest woman of so-and-so?'. Fuck off. Just fuck right off, it's none of your business.

For the record, I've been married, done the divorce thing and am now pretty much fancy free. I don't want to get married again. I've been with my current girlfriend for a while true but I don't see the point of getting married. I just don't. I don't want to have kids, she doesn't want to have kids, there's no real financial benefit, it's just something I'll have pay for and someone else that will be dependent on me. And they will be dependent on me, I've no fucking doubt about that.

Now what really annoys me about all this is a bloke who we'll call EW. Now EW is right cunt in my opinion. Oh, he's a ladies man all right, women fall over themselves for him but as a bloke he's scum in my eyes.

Now EW is getting married, yet again, and of course everyone's giving it 'Look at EW. That's love that is', or 'Why aren't you like EW?'. I don't measure my life against that prick. Right, get this. He met this woman yeah, good looking, big house, plenty of money and a big car. She got it all from some divorce she had with a banker or something. Anyways, he has fuck all and lives in the back room of his mums house. After knowing this woman 6 weeks yeah, he proposes to her, gone off to Iraq for 5 months, just come back and they're getting married in a week. Is that love? You can't know someone after six weeks, you just can't. Where does he lose in this scenario? Moving into a fucking mansion and having plenty of money. I haven't even met this woman and im tempted to marry her and I don't want to get married.

EW has had three marriages in the past, all ending in divorce because the mans a serial adulterer. He's got six kids between the three women, he sees two of the kids and the other four he has totally disowned. He also has a bastard kid which almost no one knows about, this kid he does see from time to time but the kid doesn't know he's his dad. Nice eh?

So now EW has shacked up with this woman and her two daughters. The wife has decided she wants a kid with EW. A kid that's theirs? Why do people do that? When people who already have kids get together they decide to have one between them. I see it all the time. Blokes I work with who are pushing 50 having a new kid. Why? At that age your parenting of little kids should be behind you.

Anyway, people are only going and kissing EWs arse for having another baby! While I still get shit like 'Oh EW, what a bloke, don't you think Panda? Don't you think he's setting a good example?'. No, I fucking don't. What about the half dozen kids he's got already? Egh! It makes my blood boil.

Having a kid when you've got plenty you don't see and don't give shit about already is the lowest of the fucking low.

Panda.